“I didn’t lose myself in motherhood. I found myself.” -unknown I keep finding this quote about motherhood, and it resonates in my soul. Today (May 6th) is World Maternal Mental Health Day. This Sunday also happens to be Mother's Day. With both of these on my mind, I’m reflecting on how motherhood has helped me find my way to becoming a healthier and happier me. Motherhood is my purpose . This is something that really sticks out to me when I think about motherhood. Am I saying that’s all I am- a mother? Absolutely not. But it’s really helped define me and my purpose in more ways than I ever thought possible. The trick was learning to love myself enough not to get lost in my motherhood journey. My sweet daughter Irelynn Aurora is now 2, and it still amazes me every day the little person she is becoming. She is sweet, caring, thoughtful, ridiculously smart, witty, and so funny. Looking back, I honestly don’t know what I did without her. She tells me I’m her best friend, and I don’t know how I survived without the love of this sweet little girl. In less than 6 weeks, we’re adding a little more crazy to our already crazy routine. Our son, Rooney Cian, will be here. We’re so excited, but definitely a little nervous about juggling life with two littles. Motherhood has been my greatest adventure, but it’s not been an easy one for me. It’s honestly been the happiest and most joyful time of my life. I love my little family more than anything. But through this happy time in my life, I’ve faced a lot of personal struggles. The complete joy and happiness of my motherhood journey was intertwined with anxiety, depression, self doubt, and guilt. If you have also experienced this, isn’t it crazy how the happiest time of your life can also be the biggest struggle you’ve ever faced? I won't go into all of the details of my struggles with postpartum anxiety and depression, but I know motherhood changed me as a person . It completely flipped my life, and even some of my beliefs about life, upside down. I truly feel through all of the struggle that I found myself- my purpose, my passion, my drive. I’ve learned more about myself by taking care of a little human than I ever knew possible. I hit some of my lowest lows, but also my highest highs. I’ve learned to ask for help, to say no, to stand up for myself in a new way, and to chase my passion. The road to get there was long and bumpy, but I’m heading in a direction with my life that I’m happy and excited about. I want to share a few things that motherhood has taught me so far. A few personal lessons and truths in my journey to heath, wellness and happiness. - Try not to judge other people, you don’t know what they’re battling with . Even if they seem happy on the outside, there may be something they’re battling with internally. Kindness and empathy go a long way. Not only for other people, but also for yourself. - Motherhood is my purpose . I’m trying to put more focus on this. Focusing on something that keeps you going and gives you purpose is a great way to cope with struggles. This was what kept me even a little sane. - Motherhood changed me as a person. For better or for worse, I’m a different person since my daughter entered my world. Im just trying to navigate my world as this new person. It’s challenging, but so worth it. I may have lost some people in my life, but the truly loyal people are still there and we’re closer than ever. - Mental health is serious . Seek help or find ways to cope with it as soon as you can. I just hope society finds a better way to provide people access to mental health services, because right now things are not as good as they need to be. After my struggles with trying to find help, I found my own way to cope. Nature and spending time with my daughter are the best ways to help me get outside of my mind for a while. I recently started counseling to help make sure I am in the right place mentally so that I can work through some of the lows if they come after baby boy is born. If you're unsure of where to start looking for resources to find help, reach out to your healthcare provider as soon as possible. Don't wait. - Admitting you have a problem is ok. It doesn’t make you weak. I hid things so well that in general most people were not aware of my postpartum struggles. It took me a long time to admit to myself that there was a problem, and even longer to admit this to other people. If I could change anything it would be admitting that there was a problem sooner. - What you’re eating and putting into your body is essential to physical and mental health. - Physical activity can also make a huge difference in both physical and mental health. - Sunshine . I need so much sunshine. Getting outside in the fresh air and sunshine is necessary. In my busy life, I still need to find more time for this. Luckily I live somewhere where this is so easy! - Do what makes you happy. Life is short. Don’t stay in situations that cause you more problems mentally or physically. It’s not worth it. For me I needed to give up some things in my life. Sometimes letting go is necessary . - Try not to overthink those things you can’t change . This is something I’m still really struggling with. Acceptance can be difficult. - Find something you’re passionate about and pursue it . Although I’m first and foremost a mother and wife, I needed to find something that was really mine. I needed to find something that I was passionate about again. Luckily I find passion in our farm and the farm business. It’s really helped me escape and find my passion again. - SELF. CARE . I’m terrible at this, but realizing how important it is to keep me going. Part of this is rest and sleep. I’m also terrible about this, but it’s so important. This should also include escaping for a while through meditation, reflection, prayer, music dance, or whatever helps you get out of your thoughts. - Your tribe is essential. It doesn’t have to be big, but if you have a few people in your life that are supportive it makes all the difference. Some very important people have gotten me through my darkest days. I love you all. So to all you mamas out there... you’re amazing. You really are. You’re stronger than you’ll ever know. Whether motherhood came a little easier to you, or if you struggle to find your own path as a mother- you’ve got this! Thank you for all you do for your families. I hope you find some time this week for some self care, because it’s so well deserved and necessary. Happy Mother’s Day! Yorkie Acres Farm: •Yorkie Acres Farm can be the perfect sanctuary to help you escape and clear your mind. We offer both farm visits & yurt stays. Visit www.yorkieacresfarm.com or contact us at yorkieacresfarm@gmail.com for more details. •We also offer numerous products to help you spoil your favorite mamas or even help practice some self care. Visit yorkieacresfarm.com/store to shop. {and yes, spoiling and self care should happen every day - not just on Mothers’ Day!} World Maternal Mental Health Day: • WHY WE NEED MMH DAY: Helping mothers, helping babies! In many countries, as many as 1 in 5 new mothers experience some type of perinatal mood and anxiety disorder (PMADs). These illnesses frequently go unnoticed and untreated, often with tragic and long-term consequences to both mother and child. • RAISING AWARENESS: No one is immune! Women of every culture, age, income level and race can develop perinatal mood and anxiety disorders. Symptoms can appear any time during pregnancy and the first 12 months after childbirth. There are effective and well-researched treatment options available to help women recover. • INFLUENCING POLICY: Illness is not a crime! Women are sometimes considered to be criminals instead of patients needing treatment, in the case of infanticide. Through building awareness, it aims to prevent these tragedies and stands for just and scientifically based care. • CHANGING ATTITUDE: No health without mental health! Increasing awareness will drive social change with a goal toward improving the quality of care for women experiencing all types of PMADs, and reducing the stigma of maternal mental illness. We are encouraging mental health professionals, friends and relatives of new moms to ask her how she’s really feeling and encourage her to seek help . •For more information on World Maternal Mental Health Day visit: https://wmmhday.postpartum.net About Me: I’m Alea. I’m 31 and married to one of the most hard working men. Jason is such a special person with a big heart and I’m so lucky. He’s always helping others and volunteers his time. We have a daughter, Irelynn Aurora, that is 2 and we are expecting a son in June. We live on our farm in Friendsville, Maryland. I’m a family nurse practitioner in our community’s primary care office. I also have my doctorate in nursing. I love photography, nature, animals, music and have a strong interest in herbal and natural medicine and wellness. I’m happiest when I’m outside, near water, and with my family (both human and animal family). My favorite hobby is taking photos of my daughter.